the doodle diary

this is a sketched out character sheet with expressions and some placeholder character lore. or something. ive been working through moonie's character design thread, trying to learn how to design characters. i think i like doing that. its really hard though. it can be emotionally draining to watch other people nail it in one go.

i can really tell im not as good as the other people in this thread. i dont hate this character. i do but i dont hate it so much i will stop drawing her. i can finish the project. but my own art sometimes makes me really sad. it helps to be able to look at previous character sheets and see that im already learning.

instead of dwelling on how bad it looks i try to enjoy the process. is that enough? is there a world where i never quit drawing? or do i continue to walk through this one on the brink, just like with everything else in my life. am i going to be left wondering when im going to quit? when im going to find out that all my effort was wasted and meaningless?

i dont know if any of that matters. at the end of the day i know im going to keep drawing. but im trying not to bottle all this up. nobody i know really wants to talk to me anyways. so i leave it here. welcome to my first diary entry. i dont know how often i will try to share this place, but if youve found it, this is probably my most honest self.

you still dont get to see my most honest art, though.